As I Lay Me Down To Sleep...

I pray the lord my soul to keep.
Please stay with me all through the night.
And wake me with the morning light.

I used to say this as a little girl every night with my mom before bed. We would pray for all the children, all the animals, family and friends. We asked God to love us and protect us and always be with us. To make us be nice and kind and thanked him for all we had.

Prayer. It's a powerful thing. And most of the time we take it for granted.

Prayer is not a get-out-of-jail free card. For a long time I viewed prayer as a bargaining tool. "If you let me pass Statistics I swear I'll never slack on studying ever again." "If you let me get out of this speeding ticket I swear I'll never speed again." Things like that. Then that one day came when I couldn't bargain for the one thing I wanted most. "I swear if you bring my parents back I'll...I'll...I got nothing."

Prayer isn't a give and take. It's a give and have faith kinda system that is supposed to teach you to live by the golden rule, respect your fellow man, and believe that the good in people will be shown.

I have always believed that you don't need a church to talk to God...or whoever it is you talk to. If you feel that way, that's awesome! I just feel like I can speak to that higher being just as good while washing my hair as I would sitting in a church pew. After my mother died, I started to view prayer as a communication tool rather than a message line to put in your special requests.

If God is a DJ, and you're the caller, there is no guarantee that your request is going to get answered. Others get their answer first. And sometimes what you receive on your end of the line is what you need rather than what you want.

It's taken me a long time to pray. I've been angry with the way things are in the past and I am trying to not be so bitter. After my dad died in 2009 I didn't see the point in prayer. And this past December when I lost my mom, I just said to hell with it. If I can't get back the two most important people in my life, who is there to love and protect now? The morning light could go take a hike and leave me to wallow in self pity.

I have since tried changed that outlook.

I started to pray, and not just for myself. I pray for others. I pray for my cats. I pray for my favorite sweater to not shrink in the wash. If it's too hot, I kick on my prayer-conditioner.

I guess the point of this post guys is that prayer is powerful. It's sending out good thoughts and good karma in hopes of receiving the same positive gifts back. So let's try an experiment. Let's say a little prayer tonight for our loved ones, those with us and those who are not, to always be there to send us love in one way or another. Just because my parents are guardian angels doesn't mean I can't feel their love.

So say a prayer and say goodnight. And if you feel so inclined, say a prayer for my sweater, too. Because I think the hot water cycle just made it Barbie-sized. Oh, joy.

Night guys.